En Blanco y Negro

Thunder Over Louisville

2008-04-13T20:42:00.001-07:00

March Madness

2008-03-27T18:34:00.000-07:00

Joe Alexander of West Virginia.

I love this boy.

The Invitation

2008-03-27T18:02:00.001-07:00

Cherokee Triangle Art Fair

Volver

2008-03-26T21:49:00.000-07:00

Volver

Back to NYC

2008-03-23T18:48:00.001-07:00

Doug, Rusty, me in NYC, 2006

Doug and I are taking a quick trip to New York April 8. I should be excited, but we go so often. It loses its luster after a while.

Peruvian school girls love me!!

2008-03-21T15:03:00.000-07:00

Bitches hate me

2008-02-28T23:45:00.001-08:00

Yes they do.

A Hot Mess

2008-02-11T18:41:00.000-08:00

Amy Winehouse

So, the bitch gets caught on tape smoking something out of a glass pipe.

So, the bitch goes to rehab after having a huge hit song against it.

So, the bitch goes and gets a new tooth to replace a huge gap in her grill.

So, the bitch has a boyfriend in jail.

So, the bitch GOES to rehab after all.

So, the bitch get nominated for 6 Grammys.

So, the bitch can't get a Visa to come to the states to perform.

So, the bitch performs via satellite at 4 AM London time to be on the Grammys.

So, the bitch comes out of rehab to perform "Rehab". "I said no, no, no".

So, the bitch wins 5 Grammys.

So, the bitch cries, and thanks her boyfriend (who is in jail).

So, the bitch is a fucking hot mess.

You go girl.

Super Bowl party

2008-02-05T19:58:00.000-08:00

Jews, Trannies, and Queers...OH MY!!!

2008-01-29T10:13:00.000-08:00

Saturday night I went with Doug and John to the Jewish Community Center to see a local production of "La Cage Aux Folles". It was ok.

Here is a preview.

We then went to Starbase Q's 3rd Anniversary party. It was also ok.

My Dear Readers,

2008-01-28T22:29:00.001-08:00

I welcome you to my blog. I know you have arrived from far away places like India, Malaysia, New Zealand, and Michigan. I know most of you came to this site by Googling the words, Negro and Fucking. A couple of you also had the word Gay thrown in there as well.
I hate for you to come all this way, and not find what you Googled. So, here you go.

This is Negro, a horse from Brazil, fucking his gay friend, Ponch.

A Few of my Favorite Things

2008-01-14T20:47:00.000-08:00

I stopped by Kroger on my way home to pick up three of my favorite things.

Watermelon
It isn't hard to find Watermelon in the middle of January in Kentucky, it can just be very expensive. $9.99 for a fairly small melon is a price I am willing to pay for my favorite food in the world. Hell, last year I paid $14.99 at one point.

By the way, watermelon is the ultimate hangover cure. There is something about the sugar and high water content that make me feel better after a night of heavy drinking.

Vitamin Water: XXX

I have been drinking Vitamin Water for a few years now. As with most things in Kentucky, it took a long time for anyplace in the city to start carrying this stuff.
I was really into most of the flavors, Formula 50, Defense, and the Orange-Orange were among my favorites. The only one I really despised was the Green Tea flavor, yuk!
But, sometime last year this wonderful flavor appeared on the shelf of my local market. The dark purple color and bold black and white label made me purchase it, and after one taste, I was hooked.
I don't know if you remember Slush Puppie, the sugary drink at convenient stores in the 1980's around these parts. You would pump the chosen flavor in the cup (I always put in more than they said to), then pull the lever to release the sweet pellets of ice and water. Blue Raspberry was my favorite, and XXX reminds me of that. I put it in the freezer
and let it get slush-like, then drink it through a big straw.

Breyer's Bubble Gum Ice Cream

I really like odd ice cream flavors. I still love Superman ice cream, and would still order it if I knew where to find it. But, this Bubble Gum flavor makes me so very happy.

It has such an artificial gum flavor and these bits of really sweet frozen gum that make it hard not to eat the entire carton. I am not sure that one is supposed to swallow 60 small pieces of gum in one setting, but whatever damage it causes, it is well worth it.

To top off the night I am illegally downloading Muriel's Wedding as we speak. I don't know why I don't have the DVD. Below you will find one of the best parts.

The Holiday Photo Extravaganza

2008-01-12T21:00:00.000-08:00

I have this horrible sickness that "everybody has had". It is funny you don't hear about everybody having these things until you get it. It was only bad enough to miss two days of work, although I act like I am dying every minute of the work day. And, I sound like it when I cough, so people believe me, and tell me to go home. I just say, "No, I'm fine, You need me here".

Since my life consists of earning badges playing mindless games on POGO recently, I thought I would entertain my two readers this week with photos of me in various parties and shit around the holidays.

A big shout out to my reader in New Delhi, India who arrived here by Goggling "Negro Fucking". Welcome, and Jesus loves you.

At Seth's Christmas Party.

My "A-List" Christmas Part, December 22.

Straight boys Sean and Nick

Pretty much sums it up with John

At David & JPats on X-mas night

Can you pick out the real woman?
(NO, it's not me!)

Lauren irons creatively on New Year's Eve.

Fuzion, Midnight, Tamara.

Happenings: In Review

2008-01-05T18:55:00.000-08:00

I am watching the Presidential debates at home alone, with a 12 pack of Budweiser, while the Clydesdale upstairs gets ready to go out tonight. She (Doug) walks around like she is pulling the beer wagon behind her in the Macy's parade. I should be going out, but I have already coated my face in a super-hydrating mask, and am making a long blog post for you bitches to read. [edit: not too long, second part will come later]

Vote you Sluts

Here in Kentucky, we have no vote in the primary elections. We vote after on one of the final dates, and by then the nominees are already selected.
I have not been shy about my choice: Hillary. I have pledged a small amount of money out of my checking every month, I have the T-shirt, I have the yard sign and bumper sticker. I really like them all, but I came of age when Bill Clinton was President. So, I was naturally, for Hillary. Now, after, Barak's speech, and John Edward's performance in the Caucus, I am happily confused. I would take any of them over anyone else.

This speech invokes Bill Clinton, John Kennedy, and
Martin Luther King Jr.

Here I am wearing a Hillary T-shirt at
Gay Pride 2006, way before she announced.
I am just saying.

OH....What.....A....Night

2008-01-01T18:52:00.000-08:00

I am not one to go out on New Year's Eve. It is reserved for the amateurs. But, we were all free, had nothing better to do, and decided to go out. It turned out to be a fantastic evening.
Lauren, John, and Doug met at my place for a meal that Doug cooked for us upstairs in his apartment. It was edible. We had champagne before heading out to Starbase Q to begin our night at 10:00. From there, we went to our main destination Fuzion.
We were a little apprehensive because it was 18 and over, but pleasantly surprised to see a great mix of people at the club. Drinks were flowing, and pills were popping. We ended the night with a nightcap Tryangles, and hotdogs at John's place.
I awoke, and went straight to the University of Louisville basketball game. They lost to Cincinnati by one miserable point.
I made a wonderful video of the night.

Amazing (G)Race

2007-12-31T13:43:00.000-08:00

It's been a while.
Last night, my mom, Doug, and myself attended the viewing of Amazing Race at Za's Pizza. Kynt and Vyxsin, the dynamic goth couple from Louisville have been hosting the parties for several weeks now, and we decided we had better go this week, because they came in last place on the last episode, and it looked like they may not make it this week.
They didn't.
But, they really did their best, and at one point were actually in first place. Kynt and Vyxsin's fatal mistake came when they failed to use the U-Turn on the stupid straight couple that managed to make it to check-in just moments before them.

It was just a wonderful experience not seeing redneck, hillbillies representing the state of Kentucky on TV for once. Kynt and Vyxsin may not be the "typical Kentuckians", but they are closer to what I know and love.

Vyxsin, my mom, and Kynt before the race.

Watching themselves walk off the Amazing Race.

Kynt addressing the crowd after the show.

Love Generation

2007-11-26T19:18:00.000-08:00

Another drunken video. This time from going out over the Thanksgiving holiday weekend.

I am Thankful for....

2007-11-22T21:12:00.000-08:00

All the hot boys out for the pre-Thanksgiving party at Starbase Q on Wednesday night. I am also thankful for the Vicodin that made the night more exciting. I am not thankful for the nasty gas station cheeseburger I ate at 3 in the morning.

I also did the family thing. There are less and less family members there every year. They die, they divorce, they hate each other. No one in my small family really has many children. I will soon be all alone on the holidays, except for my "gay family", that I will continue to get fucked up in clubs every major holiday.

itouch myself

2007-11-20T22:32:00.000-08:00

I am getting an ipod itouch this week, I had no idea it had this wi-fi shit. I need it and will have it.

Sunday...Bloody Sunday

2007-11-18T19:02:00.000-08:00

Thumbillina

The thumb is the most useful digit on the human hand. I cut my left thumb this week, right along the thumbnail. One would think, "use the other four fingers on the fucking hand." It does not work that way.
I cut my thumb while dicing up a $10.00 watermelon (my favorite food gets expensive in the fall/winter), in a semi-druken state.

Anything you buy at the grocery requires two thumbs to pull apart...you need two thumbs to text...and, the thumb is an important part in self pleasure.

Cars

I am getting a new (or used) car in the next week or so. I now drive a 1994 Ford Taurus, so you can see the need for a new ride. I am not a "car queen", to say the least. I am quite proud that I have not had a car payment in 10 years. It has afforded me the opportunity to travel very well, including a full month in Mexico this year. But, all good things must come to an end, and my car is on it's last leg. Here are my top contenders for the new wheels:

Honda Civic: Practical, Cheap

Toyota Yaris: Practical, Cheap

Volkswagen Jetta: Practical, Semi-Cheap

Mercedes-Benz DLK 200 Kompressor: Not Practical, Not Cheap.

I think I know where I am leaning. What do you think I should do?

Race on Bitches

The Amazing Race is fantastic once again this year, with a fantastic Goth couple from Louisville really making an impression. I have met one half of the couple (Kynt), and am so thrilled to have someone representing the state of Kentucky that are neither hicks or conservatives. They were fourth (really tied for second) tonight on the show.

They have a viewing party at Za's Pizza down the street. I think I will ask my mother if she wants to go next week, as she is a big Amazing Race fan.
I am applying for Big Brother 9. I really don't expect much out of it, but it is something to do while I have a job that will let me off whenever I want.

Popping the Blog Cherry

I am a "blog whore". I have about 15 blogs I check daily, and another 100 that I read at least weekly.
I will never forget my first experience of meeting a blogger that I read. We were at Starbase Q one lovely evening, and I recognized a cute, young guy across the bar. I told Doug that it this guy was from a blog I read. The blog was the now defunct Filthy/Gorgeous, and the author was from Seattle. So, I had to do a triple take to make sure it was him, it was. He was so thrilled to be recognized. I was his first, and from such a backwoods like Kentucky. I think he was surprised we had the internets around these parts.
Well, I got spotted out this weekend for this blog. A super cute, super cool, super nice guy came to blog via a comment I left on Andy Towle's blog TowleRoad. The ironic thing is the guy that spotted me works at Starbase Q, the very place I met my first blogger. Hi Rob. Sorry for the photo.

My bestest of friends don't even know about my blog. If they find it, fine. But, I talk about a lot of people on here, so it's best they don't. Thank god they are not smart enough to follow the links from YouTube.

My Old Kentucky Homo

2007-11-12T21:42:00.001-08:00

Video of a typical Friday

I am alive

2007-11-06T21:42:00.001-08:00

Duck Down

Weekend recap

2007-10-27T00:23:00.000-07:00

Fucking Tornado

2007-10-18T19:15:00.000-07:00

Sorry about my lack of updates...I just really don't care.
Tonight the tornadoes came, and ruined my life. I just wanted to have a couple beers and watch Ugly Betty, but no. The tornado warnings began about 7:30, and have gone all night long. This means no network TV.
Lucky for you, I took an exhilarating video. I am both excited and scared by these storms. My first memory is of a storm.
The sirens in the video are the most haunting thing.

Weekend

2007-10-14T18:24:00.000-07:00

Sicky won't be sicky anymore...

2007-10-10T18:29:00.000-07:00

The title is a line from Val of Will & Grace.

I started feeling sicky the moment I walked into work today. I was sneezing all day long. It is not uncommon for me to do this during the spring, as I have horrible seasonal allergies. But, I chalked this up to a cold. It was over 90° for the past three days, and now the lows are nearing 40°. Whatever it is, I am not one that gets sick. I did as a child, but not as an adult really.

I walked up the street after I got home and relaxed on the couch for the new episode of Pushing Dasies. I am not sure I like the show except for Kristen Chenowith. Thank god I changed out of my comfy sweat pants into Jeans, as I saw three people I knew on the short two block journey.

home again, home again, jiggity jig

2007-10-07T17:30:00.000-07:00

I came home late last night (Saturday) after a horrific week of sitting for a house and two dogs and a fucking ton of work. As soon as I stepped out of the car, I heard the party going on upstairs. I had taken a couple Vicodin at work and had a Xanax in the pocket so I mustered up the energy to venture upstairs after running into my neighbor Ryan on my way in. A group of my friends had been at the St. James Art Fair all day, and they were still going strong. Doug, John S., and Chris talked me into going out after the festivities ended at the house. We headed to Fuzion....it was Chris' choice....a bad one....as I knew it would be.

It was Goth Night, I guess. The four of us were dressed like a page out of an Abercrombie catalog; flip-flops, jeans, and cute print T-shirts. We tried to stay for the "show". The songs were cute, and it was a good crowd for Fuzion. But, it was not our crowd. I took a couple pics of the performers.

Later, we went to Tryangle's, where it was a parade of tears and old queers. But, I got many compliments, and looked like hell.

Well, I am about to watch my show on Univision, Buscando la Nueva Banda. I am watching Miss mexico 2007 right now....Nuestra Belleza.

Christ on the Cross

2007-10-04T20:25:00.000-07:00

I have never worked so much in my life. I think I am going to die. I have completely fucked up two major things at work. Tonight, a party that I booked a few days ago showed up at our other restaurant across town. I forgot that I was now booking parties for both places. Luckily, they were very cool about it, and the entire group made the drive to the other restaurant. I felt terrible bacause I had talked to the woman 6 times on the phone and she was so accomodating about everything.

I also double booked a room for a date in November, and have not called the second party back yet to deliver the bad news. I am going to get fired (not really), but I hope I can resolve it in a peaceful manner. I have been working 12 hours a day for the last 7 days, and will continue to do so until Monday. Yes, I am making insane amounts of money (like what I would make in a month), but feel sorry for me.

In addition, I have to take care of the puppies, who awake at 5:30 AM on the dot to be fed and let out. They shed, they shit, they whine, they bark, they crowd me in the bed.....like an exboyfriend I had.

Speaking of exboyfriends, my favorite one, Jaymes, called me and wanted to know about the plans for this weekend. BFF Doug also called wanting to know plans. See, it is St. James Art Fair weekend in Louisville....aka "the queer cruising event of the year". I always have the biggest and best group roaming the streets with me. Alas, I will be working and watching the bitches all weekend in suburbia hell.

BTW, sorry if everything is mispelled. There is no checker on dial-up.

Trabajo cada dia para vivir en esta vida (I be working a lot).

2007-10-02T20:52:00.000-07:00

The title is a line from a Shakira song.
I am still housesitting/ dogsitting....still using a free trail on dial-up. It still sucks.
Work is overwhelming me. I am doing two jobs as I said. I have to return all these calls everyday. Today there were 20 messages. Half the people I have to call back are fine....they don't care about how much shit costs, they have 60 people coming to dinner....they want to spend a lot of money. The other half are cheap penny pinching cunts that want a private party for 18 bitches that want to fuck the server I schedule for party, and don't understand when I say no. I have a shit load of calls to return tommarow...yet I sit here at midnight drinking vodka.
I have drank almost all the vodka in the house, one bottle of Grey Goose and one bottle of Absolut. They owe it to me after being without internet all week. Dial-up is the same as being without internet.
The dogs shit all over the carpet because I went for dinner and drinks at my friends place, Mojito Tapas. I was gone all day working, and drinking. I puked cleaing it up. I had to shampoo the fucking carpet. I don't think I will tell them it happened.
Jenna Bush is on Larry King......Whitehouse wedding.....excuse me while I vomit.....again.

Housesitting Whore

2007-10-01T20:02:00.000-07:00

I have not posted because I am housesitting/ dogsitting.
Now, this would not normally be a problem, as they have wonderful highspeed cable internet installed on a beautiful new Dell desktop PC, but it is not working right now!! I was not informed of this by my friends before arriving, they knew I would be over it. I am.
I did not bring my laptop, so I can't just run over to the Deli a mile up the street, and check my shit. I am working the job of the chic that I am housitting for plus my regular hellish job, so I can't really run home at all. I have to come let the damn dogs out and feed them all the time.
I am now on DIAL-UP!!!
I found a phone extension line and connected it, then signed up for a free trial on MSN. It is soooooooooooooooo slow. I do not know how people live like this.
Doug told me to read a book....yeah right.
I hope my 3 readers will stick with me through this trying time. I promise I will be back with mind blowing posts after next weekend.

We ain't got no queers around here

2007-09-24T21:55:00.000-07:00

Yes, this clip is from FOX News...but at least they showed it!

The party

2007-09-23T21:39:00.000-07:00

Stuffy's birthday party went fairly well. People were in and out all night. At least three people made drunken fools of themselves, I was not one of them this time.

Stuffy does a Jello shot.

Charles, Peter, Emily, and Josh

Diana, Ryan, Chris, me

Vanessa, David V., and me

Doug and Josh

with Chris

Stuffy raping hot Josh

Jennifer and Kellan

with Ashley L.

Josh, Doug, and John

with Mike, Bobby, Doug, and John

with Mike

with Ashley L. and Sean

laughing with Stuffy

Mike fucking Stuffy on the Soloflex

Doing shots of cheap tequila out of plastic cups.

Stuffy acting like a slut.

Butching it up

2007-09-20T18:21:00.000-07:00

Over the past few days, I have been hearing this constant hissing noise emanating from beneath the floor in bedroom. My old car makes a lot of noises too. I just turn up the radio to drown them out. But, this was perplexing, and after three days of the persistent sound, and after Doug came down and heard it as well, I thought it was time to investigate.

This is no easy task. It means I have to move my table and chairs in my kitchen, which sit on a large round rug, and open the gates of hell. I live in an old historic home in an old historic neighborhood, and getting into the cellar is a pain in the ass. The gas meters for my house are down there, which means once a month a redneck man from Louisville Gas & Electric comes knocking at my door at 8 in the morning to read the damn things. He used to have a key and let himself in while I lay in bed, but I have changed the locks since then. I only let him in every four months or so now, or when they threaten to cut my gas off. I did not smell gas however, so I let the sound continue.
I bit the bullet tonight though, and ventured down the steps. I called my father before going down the steep steps, so he could guide me as to what I found (or in case I got killed or injured, I would have someone on the phone). What I found was water dripping everywhere. I concluded that it was hot water coming from a copper pipe leading out of the hot water heater. With the help of my father, I found how to turn it off. Leaving it off is not an option however as Doug, who lives upstairs, gets up at 5AM to get ready for work. I have barely been asleep sometimes by then.

After several phone calls to a few different people, the conclusion was that I should try to dry it off, and duct tape it real good. So, I put my pink bandanna around my head, and headed down again with tape and towel in hand. I arduously dried and taped the fucker. It was steamy and hot, kind of like the steam room at the bathhouse without a chance at any action, but I persisted.
I anxiously turned the cobweb covered valve again, just knowing that my duct tape work would solve the problem. It didn't. Water started spewing from everywhere along the taped up pipe. Fuck it! I left it on, marched up the steps, and closed the doors. I am not going without hot water. The plumber can come deal with it tomorrow.

In happier news, I made Jello shots in every color of the rainbow for the party Saturday. I don't ever remember making them before. I Googled for the recipe. Who knew there were over 100 different recipes, using all kinds of alcohol, and different proportions of cold and hot water?

I made about 11 of each flavor; lemon, orange, strawberry, cherry, blue raspberry, lime, and grape. I arranged them on serving trays and covered them with cling wrap for easy access Saturday.

Thank god I haven't butched up completely.

Boys of Summer

2007-09-19T22:46:00.000-07:00

The summer has come to an end. My best friends, David and JPat, have a magnificent pool that I rarely used last year, unfortunately. But, this year I made it my mission to spend as much time there as possible. They love me, I love them.

This is the soundtrack to this post, "Boys os Summer". Play it if you dare.

with Lauren.
She made a special appearance from Chicago
for a weekend.

John S., Jessica, and Doug
Old school friends...nothing could change it.

Me, in the pool

CB in the pool
She makes appearances once in a while.

Tina
A true fixture on the scene,
I have come to love her.

Me with Chris, Brian, and David C.
I am pretty sure I am cracked at this point.

Mike, David C., and Mike
They round out our crazy group.

with David V. and David C.
We look good.... from the chest up.

Kieth
Girl Please, Kieth is pure fun.

Where's Chazz at??? With David C.
Te Quiero mi amigo.

Jpat and Lauren share a moment...

I had a fab summer!!!

I don't like to share

2007-09-18T20:29:00.000-07:00

My fair city of Louisville is in the midst of a renaissance. The city center has been undergoing a major overhaul. Downtown living is chic again, the best eateries and hotels are now downtown, and nightlife has exploded. Well, gay nightlife has been downtown forever, we are always the first to know a good thing though. The total investment in the city center is over two billion dollars. The city is attracting new business and attention, and visitors are coming for conventions, and just to be here at times other than The Kentucky Derby. While I am all for progress, I live in Louisville for a reason, it has always been a laid back, lazy river city, and that fits me perfectly.

The Developments

Already, over the last five years, we have a new convention center, new hotels, most notably 21c and Marriott, and 4th Street Live. 4th Street Live is a huge multilevel complex full of clubs, restaurants, and shops. It is pretty, but full of commercial, touristy places like Hard Rock Cafe and TGI Fridays. It attracts the convention tourists and rednecks from outside the city that seek a "night in the city".

The future developments get more interesting.

Museum Plaza will become the tallest building in the state, by far, and will be one of the most unique and daring skyscrapers in the country. It is being developed as a mix-use facility, with a hotel, condos, apartments, offices, the MFA program for the University of Louisville, and a huge modern art museum floating half way up the building. It will have a diagonal elevator that will take visitors from the historic ironclad building on Main Street to the ultramodern sky lobby overlooking the Ohio River and city.

A new arena is being built right in the heart of the central business district. The facility will be a state of the art 23,000 seat show piece that will primarily house the University of Louisville men's and women's basketball teams. It is already being sold as a possible site for other NCAA tournaments and conventions.
I am most excited about this project, as I have season tickets to U of L basketball, and the current situation with Freedom Hall at the fairgrounds in horrible. I have to drive in nasty traffic to get there, there are no restaurants or bars around, and to get out in less than 30 minutes requires leaving before the game ends.

Other projects include City Center, with retail, offices, hotels, movie theaters, a concert venue, and restaurants and bars. This is said to be an extension of 4th Street Live. I hope it is filled with better shit than that place though.

River Park Place is a huge housing complex being built right on the Ohio River.

The Iron Quarter is another entertainment district being planned on old Whiskey Row, right next to the new arena. It will also contain a new high rise housing complex, and places like ESPN Zone and Crate & Barrel tentatively.

In addition, there are new medical complexes being built, like a new Veterans Hospital. Housing is popping up everywhere downtown, ranging from simple studios and lofts to huge high rise condos. New, upscale restaurants like, Jeff Ruby's and Proof on Main are all the rage downtown as well.

I don't want to Share Louisville

The latest, controversial ad campaign to come out of this is from the people at ShareLouisville.org. It tells the tongue in cheek stories of various people living in bigger cities around the country. They are frustrated by high crime, lack of advancement, cost of living, and general happiness about their current city. But, it doesn't really expand on why Louisville is a better place to live, instead it bashes the other cities. I am not sure this is effective, but here are a few examples.

Los Angeles

Atlanta

Boston

Why should I share Louisville? I love my city for what it is. I don't want to be the next Indianapolis or Atlanta.

I am selfish, sorry.

Suck it Jesus

2007-09-17T21:28:00.000-07:00

The Writing is on the Wall

Once again I was fixing to do this wonderful post about graffiti. I have this AT&T phone box outside my backyard that has been hit by graffiti, and was featured in the latest issue of Cherokee Triangle Newsletter. I live a very historic hood, and we have our own newsletter, so suck it. I had called 311 (MetroCall) about the tagging on various occasions, but in the article I learned you need to call 911 and report it as a crime to get some action.
I had these fantastic photos of graffiti on my super new cell phone that I had taken in various bathrooms and alleys. But, I erased them all inadvertently when I put the memory card into my laptop. So, the photos and the enlightening post for the night are gone.
The AT&T phone box thingy was recently painted to erase all the previous markings, which included drawings of penises, and words like "pussy" and "slut", two of my favorite words. I found the art refreshing, and welcomed it to my somewhat pristine and sterile, although liberal and enlightened hood.
Today, a new almost inconspicuous marking has appeared. It may be a threat to our Homeland Security. It reads, "WE ARE THE TERRORISTS". I don't think 311 or 911 can handle this. Does anyone have the number to Michael Chertoff's office? I don't care if the terrorists blast other places, but not in my backyard!!!

Hey Mr. DJ

So, you know I am hosting this birthday party for my friend Stuffy Saturday, and I burned a mp3 CD that could play for several hours. I was really trying to keep a "straight sense" about me while choosing the songs for the playlist for the night, but what do straight peeps listen to?? I want to impress the super hot, young boys that are coming from our work with my musical taste.
I just don't know what the kids listen to these days. I keep up more or less, and I know what I like. Timbaland, Rihanna, Nelly Furtado, and Justin Timberlake I like. I know all the dance music still that is popular in the gay world. So, I just combined it all, and downloaded new shit for an eight hour extravaganza that includes: KD Lang, Ricky Martin, Shakira, and Culture Club. That's not too gay is it??
Oh, I am making jello shots in every color of the rainbow for the party. It should make for a wonderful photo that I will post in full color here. Yes, I do allow color on my blog if it is relevant or I am too lazy to change the photo.

Jesus sucks, Kathy does not

I love me some Kathy Griffin. She can do no wrong in my book that nobody reads. But, when she won that Emmy, and said, "Suck it Jesus, This is my god now", I said aloud, "Oh girl, what have you done?"
I don't believe in god, I don't believe in Jesus, and I believe Christianity is the biggest problem in my country. But, you can't say it out loud.
Well, I guess you can. I love her more than ever after seeing her talk about it tonight on Larry King. She did not even defend herself. Kathy was unapologetic and defiant. She owns what she says, and I love it.
The comment was censored from the airings of the program, of course. Suck it Christians. They put a full page ad in the USA Today denouncing her statement (they being a group of actors/ dancers from Tennessee). She is one of the few people that can make me laugh. She best not stop doing it either.

I promise all of my readers (yes, all two of you), more enlightening posts soon.

Bloody Sunday Shorts

2007-09-16T16:05:00.000-07:00

Reality Whore

I have conflicting shows on tonight at 8, Big Brother 8, and Buscando a Timbiriche: La Nueva Banda. I am a reality show whore.
I am completely over BB8. This season sucked beyond belief. My mother is a fanatic of the show, and always buys the live feeds on RealPlayer, so I have access to watch them whenever I want. I gave up on watching the feeds after they voted off the hottest and most interesting guys. What is left?? Evil Dick and Danielle, an estranged father/ daughter pair that are devoid of any interesting qualities. The few that left before them were uncharismatic as well. Amber was a cry baby. Jameka was a crazy Christian (she was the lesser of all the evils), and Eric and Jess were the most boring "showmance", in the history of reality TV.

I will be watching instead, the three hour program, Buscando a Timbiriche: La Nueva Banda. I watch very little Univision. I should to help me with my Spanish, but the shows are so cheesy and badly done that I can't watch much on that channel. But, this American Idol type show is casting new members for a hugely popular 80's group called Timbiriche. Paulina Rubio is the most famous to come out of this group, and most notably, the only one of the original members not on the current show. Alberto is pictured, and one of the reasons I watch. He is a hotter and younger Luis Miguel.
I met Paulina Rubio twice while in Monterrey, Mexico. She was so nice to me. I spoke to her in Spanish always, and I was nervous as fuck. She gently corrected my errors speaking her native tongue. I love her, and her music.

Cleaning House

I have a full weekend coming up, and a full work week ahead. I am hosting a birthday party for my friend Stuffy (aka Stacy) Saturday. I call her Stuffy because she always has her pussy stuffed with some good dick. I will have a full report on the festivities.
I have to have an immaculately clean house before any party. I may not have the best shit in my house, but shit looks worse when it's dirty. So, I started cleaning today. I have been trying to keep a clean place,but I am a total slob.
It is so easy to be the biggest slob when you live alone. I take off my clothes as I enter the back door through the kitchen and throw them right on the floor. I eat a bag of pretzels and throw the bag on the chair next to me, where it stays for a few days. These are all things I am improving.
There is a new piano in the storage room, my front living room. I have two living rooms, and the first one is full of my BFF's (Doug) stuff. The latest arrival is an upright piano. I was a bit concerned when I heard upright piano at first. I thought it would look like one of those grotesque pianos we had in elementary school that belonged in saloon from a western movie. It doesn't look too bad, does it???

Countdown to Timbiriche is on....I may post the results later. The first member is chosen tonight.

The Magic Skin Flute

2007-09-15T19:24:00.000-07:00

I went to see my first ballet ever tonight, Mozart's The Magic Flute. I can't believe I had never seen a ballet until tonight....on second thought, maybe I saw a ballet in college. Who knows? We would often get drunk or drop acid before attending such functions.
I really enjoyed the performance tonight. It was mesmerizing. A completely black stage punctuated by these amazing dancers in colorful costumes. The Vicodin I took before the show could have helped a bit though.
We left at halftime (intermission), which is par for the course when my mom and I go see something. Over an hour was enough for me, plus one of the biggest football games of the year was on at the same time, University of Louisville vs. University of Kentucky. I'm not a major football fan, but, this is a big in state rivalry, and I like to keep up on such stuff. If the guys had been dressed and looked like the guy in the picture, we would have stayed for sure.

In other more important news, the hot guy at the liquor store up the street from my house has been telling me I look like Alex Krycek from The X-Files. I had never watched more than 5 minutes of this show in my life, but I like him telling me I look like someone. I wonder if he has a secret man crush on Krycek, and wants to role play?
Apparently Krycek is a secret agent. Maybe hot liquor store guy wants me to come in as Krycek and tell him I am investigating aliens infiltrating area liquor stores. Then, take him into the walk-in beer cooler where I would have to strip search him. I would conclude the aliens had taken over his body, and have to suck them out of him personally.

Hummm, I think I am out of Stoli. Be back later.

Thunder Thighs

2007-09-14T20:21:00.000-07:00

I was doing this big political post about North Korea and shit, but I'm not in that mood now. I will save it for later. So, I am doing a post on a drunken night that happened on the second most festive night in Louisville (following The Kentucky Derby).

Thunder over Louisville is the kickoff to a two week celebration of festivals, parades, and parties, leading up to the Kentucky Derby. It is said to be the largest fireworks display in North America, an all day air show along the Ohio River, followed by a 40 minute extravaganza of music and exploding lights. An entire bridge is even set in flames. I don't really get into fireworks much, but this is a reason to party with 500,000 rednecks, I mean people, crowding the waterfront.
The party was at my friend Mike's new place in the gay, gay, gay downtown apartment building, The Carlyisle. We got there about 7:00, a few hours before the fireworks would start, and the night progressed from there. I will follow with a picture commentary.

Doug and I have a pre-party drink at Tryangle's

The boys of the party. My ex's are marked by the arrows,
and the host, Mike, is to my right. In a small city, your
ex's are everywhere.

David V. and I enjoying the fireworks on the rooftop.

My favorite ex, Jaymes. I am starting to look a bit rough.

I was still looking a bit frazzled, but alert with unknown male,
Jaymes, and John at the after party.

The big gay party that night is at Connection.
Ashlee and I sit on the balcony. Yeah,
beyond rough in this picture.

OK, I was completely drunk at this point, kissing
Rusty, with Ashlee.

"Cracked to the core" with unknown lezbot at Connection.

Overall, it was a pretty perfect night.

Fire on the Montain

2007-09-13T20:59:00.000-07:00

I have a notoriously short attention span. It makes it especially difficult for me to last through a lot of theater that I see. But, tonight was an exception. It was the opening production for Actors Theatre of Louisville, Fire on the Mountain. It was a short (1 1/2 hour, no intermission) musical about the lives of coalminers in the Appalachian Mountains. The music was mainly Bluegrass with a bit of Soul tossed in at times.

I really never knew much about Appalachia until I went to Centre College in Danville, Kentucky. The school itself is not in the mountains, it is in the middle of the state, but, my freshman roommate was from Harlan, Kentucky. Harlan is in the middle of coal country.
Russ was a random roommate pairing, and we couldn't have been greater opposites. He was a "good ole' boy" from the rural hills that came to college to play football. I was a "gay ole' boy" from suburbia that went to college to play around. Needless to say, we parted ways, as roomies, after our first year.
He taught me a lot though in one weekend when he invited me back to his hometown. I was a bit surprised by the invitation, but accepted either because I had nothing better to do, or felt rude saying no.
I knew his family had money. Most of the kids at my college had money, as it is the most expensive school in the state. His home was very nice, in a semi-rural subdivision outside the "city", but not palatial really. His family was much of what I expected, into football, god, and country, quite the opposite of mine. The house was decorated what I call "Country Kitchen", but it was a classier version, not like a trailer with geese on the towels and throw pillows.

Anyway, his dad had some bigwig job that had to do with the coal industry. So, when we went to dinner that Saturday night, Russ' father took me around the county a bit, and show me some of the sights. One of the things that I remember most about the tour was seeing the results of strip mining. Now, I am not a big environmentalist, but the effects of this mining seemed devastating to the land. The rolling hills covered with trees were stunning in shades of red and yellow, as fall had just begun. But, then we would pass huge areas devoid of trees or grass, or seemingly any wildlife. It looked horrible.
I never really got if his family was for or against strip mining. That was many years ago though before the state of Kentucky really started to look down on it, and his family made their living from coal indirectly. So, I imagine they were not too opposed.

The other thing I noticed along those roads on my first trip to Appalachia was the poverty. I had never seen a real shack that people lived in before. I think I even asked Russ if some of these places were people's homes, and I think he laughed a bit.
Later in my college career, I would make friends with Amy Sue and Sarah, who were from Pikeville and Ashland respectively (both in the Appalachian Mountains). I become comfortable traveling home with them sometimes, and got to know I world I never knew existed.

Fire on the Mountain brought back some of my old Kentucky exploring days. The twangy, kitschy music I used to love from Dwight Yoakam and Uncle Tupelo came back to me, as well as the extreme poverty and hardship that many in my state face. Hell, I barely leave my neighborhood now, and never leave my city unless I am flying far away. Maybe I should take another look around my state.

The Weekend (mainly in pictures)

2007-09-12T22:51:00.001-07:00

It was Gallery Hop weekend. Doug and I had done every one of them this summer, so why miss this one? We pre-partied at John S. new place which was in walking distance of the festivities. Cute place, bad wallpaper. David & Jpat met us there.
But, the police were allover the place, and really being bitches about the open containers on the street.
In all previous Gallery Hops, the alcohol is free flowing, and mainly free. Apparently, the City of Louisville got over this, and started cracking down.....we had to pay for beers!!!

David V. and I at the Gallery Hop.

Jpat, David V., and John S. at Jennica's on Market St. after the Hop.

I told them to act like celebrity whores....it wasn't a stretch.

It was my precious friend Tamara's 21st birthday that night at Fuzion as well. She seemed so thrilled when we arrived. I don't know where else I would have been though.
When we arrived there was a total VIP section set up for her party, with bottles of vodka and trays of shots. Hey, I am all for that.

She looked great, and I had a ton o' fun.

John S. was "cracked to the core" on a bed in the VIP area.

I had to work the next morning (Saturday) at Austin's, but imagine my delight when my friend and bartender Jen K. was hungover!! The bitch doesn't drink (much, and I have never seen her like this).
Overall it was a 3 1/2 star weekend (out of 5).

A Tale of Two Grandmas

2007-09-11T21:01:00.000-07:00

I am a confirmed atheist. I believe all creatures on Earth come from the same beginnings. We are all just animals that are born, live, and die. But, I just can't stop watching Sylvia Browne on Montel Williams every Wednesday morning. And, I have always known that I see and feel things other people don't.

I remember at like 6 years old, going to K-Mart in Clarksville, Indiana with my Grandma Neff (Great-Grandmother). One day we were walking out of the store, and I told her, "That cart is going to hit that car".

The cart was completely still, and I think she mostly ignored me. When we got closer to my Grandma's 1975 Oldsmobile Delta 88, the cart began to roll on it's own. Seconds later it slammed into said car.
We got in the car, she turned to me and asked, "How did you know that?" I never forgot that moment.
I was her favorite. At Christmas, I would have to open presents before the other Grandkids got there, and keep quiet about what I got. In 1979, it was a portable black & white TV with a radio. This was quite the deal back then. It was huge and bulky, but state of the art then.
I remember when she died, December 5, 1980. I knew she was dead long before my mother came into my room to tell me. I probably knew the exact minute she passed. I don't remember much else about that time in my life, but that date and time are etched in my memory.

Everyone in my family is basically dead. They die young and they die old. But, my Grandma Jones is the latest one to "Sylvia Browne" me.

That is her with my cousin Pam, who died shortly after my Grandma. She was the cool cousin that "understood me".
Anyway, I was never as close to Grandma Jones as Grandma Neff, and I always felt a bit of resentment in that from Grandma Jones. I was always a bit scared of her. She taught preschool at Morton Memorial United Methodist Church, where I attended, and I can only remember two things about my time there: I could never have the chocolate cake for dessert (they thought I was allergic to chocolate, which was false), and her giving me half an aspirin one time from a locket around her neck. I must have had a fever or something. She took me to the water fountain, and told me, "I can give this to you, but not the others, because we are family," or something like that. I couldn't swallow it, and it tasted like shit. I have always had a hard time swallowing pills.

Later, we would become very close after my parents divorced in 1981, and my dad lived with them. About the same time she began to lose her vision. By the time I was spending time with her on a regular basis, she was legally blind. But, this didn't stop me from taking her to Greyhound Supermarket every Saturday morning and guiding the cart up and down every aisle, while she held tight to the handlebar. I would tell her about all the sales, and anything new or interesting in the store. All the while, the employees would say, "Hi Mrs. Jones". She knew them all my name upon recognizing their voice. I would do the same thing at the new Target store in town too. I would put a blanket or rug in her hand, and describe the colors or pattern to her, and she knew. She could still see color in her mind.
I would read The Evening News to her. We would sit on the front porch together, and talk to the neighbors passing by. We grew a bond that would never be changed as I entered adulthood and spent less time with her.
When she was dying, I visited her often in the hospital. The day she died I was there alone with her, hours before she passed. She seemed really lucid, calling me by name, and talking about some crazy shit she needed to do around the house. It made me laugh. Later, my dad called me, and said she had died.
Since her death, she has been with me in every way, every day. I dream about her driving while she is still blind. I have moments where I think I am going to drive across the bridge to her house and sit in the glider on the front porch with her. And, even as I was writing this the night light in my bedroom, the only one visible from my point of view, blinked at me. It does this every so often. And, I think of her, or think that someone is watching over me.
I hope the bulb never burns out, for fear that it will never blink again.

YouTube Raves

2007-09-10T20:14:00.000-07:00

Once upon a time I was a bigger YouTube whore than I am now. I would spend hours getting lost on the site. One click leads to another 4 minute waste of time, followed by another 6 minute clip of some drag queen in Huntsville, Alabama doing a disgrace to Deborah Cox. But, there is often that wonderful treasure that you find, it lifts your spirits.
Most of these aren't uplifting or life changing, but I like it.

Larry Craig vs. Avenue Q.

Kitty Say What (Morphing Kittens), is the gayest thing ever. But, I LOVE IT!! With well over 2 million views it is a YouTube Classic.

I guess it can get gayer. This is as gay as it gets. Tony Randall introducing Jennifer Holliday at the 1982 Tonys. And, she is performing "And I'm Telling You". This is a one of those Earth shattering YouTube videos.

I love William Sledd. He is a fellow Kentuckian. He has his own show at Bravotv.com. I just think it is genius that a gay guy living in Paducha, Kentucky (a few of my good friends are from there), and working at The Gap, can make such a splash reading people about their clothes. And, Kentucky is full of bad taste. Kentucky Derby much?

Labor Day Weekend

2007-09-09T15:28:00.000-07:00

I had looked forward to this weekend for sometime. I planned a potluck dinner at the pool (David & Jpat's), which was to be the finale to a great summer.
I'm not sure it was the most action packed summer of my life, but it was definitely the hottest. Here, in Kentucky, when it gets into the 90's it gets unbearable. This year it was several days in the 100's I had to deal with.

Saturday was White Party at Starbase Q. Lauren was visiting me (and her family) from Chicago, so she collected me, and we met Doug & John at Tryangles. We immediately went to Q. The bar had been completely transformed. It was completely draped in white cloth and snowflakes, and awash in black light.

John L. gave me tongue bath on the back of my neck. No objections here. Lauren spilled drinks down the Mormon Jew's pants. I would have cleaned it up for him though.

The next day was to be the big event by the pool. Everyone ruined it more or less for me though, and all my hard work was in vain.
That is being a bit dramatic. It turned out to be a barrel of fun. I was in charge of chicken. David, Jpat, & Chris had partied hard the day before (Saturday), and were all hurting a bit at the outset of the day. Hair of the dog, and they got over it.

David C. was a fun pool buddy as always. All the usual suspects were in attendance: Tina, Brian, Chris, John S., Mike, Doug, Rusty, Stuffy, Lauren, Kieth, and the hosts. We also had a special appearance by Lauren's fuck buddy and a couple lezbots.
I heard the food was good, but didn't eat much. I got drunk by the time we rang the dinner bell.
The highlight of the day was the reigning of a new "Pool Whore", and that distinction went to................Chris.

Oh, I almost forgot about the going away party I organized for Bill H., a coworker, at Bearno's on Labor Day. I was completely worn out, as a small group came back to my place after the pool day and "partied" until dawn.
But, I made it to the party, right up the street from my house, and stayed for a couple drinks. At least my baby Jen N. was there looking great.

Vacation Tricks

2007-09-08T22:01:00.000-07:00

We have all had our share of vacation hook-ups (I have had my fair share at least), the good, the bad, and the ugly. This is a story of all three wrapped into one.
I decided to spend a month in Puerto Vallarta, the gay beach side capital of Mexico. I was arrived the second week of May 2007, and stayed until the second week of June. I rented a two bedroom/ two bath condo for the month on the cheap. It was slightly off the beaten path, but i knew it was in the heart of "gay Vallarta". I spent the first few days alone, just getting re familiarized with the city.
I had been to Puerto Vallarta several times before with my mother, who wanted me to suggest a vaction place for us after her boss started giving her two free tickets anywhere for a Christmas gift. What a better place than PV, for the culture, shopping, restaurants, and beach that she loves, and the gay boys I love. She loves gay boys too, me being her only child.

This time it was gay boys only for the entire month (except one hag....which turned out to be ok). I booked the boys into the condo. Two groups, one left on the day the others arrived. Anyway, this is a tale of two tricks...back to the story.
I met the first trick within the first week. David & JPat had just arrived a day before, and I took them to the hottest new club in the city, Club Manaña. I was completely wasted when I returned from the bathroom, and David told me a boy was asking about me in horrible English. Long story short, we met, and he went home with me.
Over the next couple of weeks, he leached onto me, and I grew tired of it. We hung out, got to know each other. I could never pronounce his name. Sex was marginal, at best.

A couple weeks later under the watch of second group of friends, and a potent hit of ecstasy, I met another, more to my taste Mexican man, Francisco. It was at the same Club Manaña. I was in love for the night. My previous trick was doing drag in another club for the night. Yes, I fucked a drag queen.
Francisco and I dropped more X together that night,and danced until dawn. Later, we went back to his modest apartment, and had that sex you can only have while on the X.
Next day - he wanted to go drinking, early. we had barely slept, and were both giddy from the sex and drugs. We went to the "gay beach" where I had spent my previous 25 days with Wencesiao (first trick). Wences was there, and the drama ensued. Only, I did not care. I felt like I was breaking the heart of someone that had never loved before, but I felt proud about it.
Wences would never approach until Francisco went to the store. When Wences finally did approach the DJ on the beach was playing the most appropriate song, Niño.

Niño es hora de partir
La vida me invito
Hacia otro lugar,
Sin ti Ves,
Tambien me duele
Es, lo mejor
Dejame irme,
Dejame partir

I broke Wencesiao's heart, Francisco broke mine. Karma may be a bitch, I may have met her.